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Acceptable Sex Standards In Dating?

This whole matter of the acceptable sex standards which you will expect of each other, is one of the most difficult problems you will face.

Statements from a number of college young people indicate that they prefer to marry virgins, and expect fidelity after marriage. If these are your acceptable sex standards, what are your chances of getting what you want?

For most girls who demand strict standards, the reply must frankly be, not very good. Recent studies reveal that in certain groups, only one man out of ten is virgin at the time of marriage. Half of all men commit adultery after marriage. Women are less lax, and yet far more so than they once were.

You do not, however, usually select your mate from the "general population." If your selection is from certain groups, your chances of getting the moral standards you wish will be much higher.

Among high school graduates, the proportion of male virgins is eight times as great, and among college graduates, sixteen times as great as among those who have graduated from grade school only. Among active church members, the proportion of virgins is appreciably higher than among non-church groups.

Those who regard virginity and fidelity as important have a good chance of getting it, if they select from the right groups. Remember that you are dating a person, not a statistic. The important thing is to decide in advance what you will each demand, and what you may expect from the other.

Highly publicized evidence that conventional acceptable sex standards are widely violated has led some to the erroneous conclusion that sex standards are on the way out. Such is far from likely. Women are unquestionably more lax than were their grandmothers.

The behavior of men seems about the same as it always has been. Adultery has historically been far more common than most have supposed. Furthermore, the difference between conventional standards and actual practice is not peculiar to sex.

Studies indicate that political corruption and even theft have been and are as widespread as sexual laxity. We do not therefore suggest that we abandon our standards in these areas.

Yet the person who marries today does have one problem which is more difficult than it used to be; a greater confusion in society itself as to what are the acceptable sex standards.

However lenient society demands about sex or how acceptable sex standards may have become at some point, you need to require certain standards of your dating partner which are strictly enforced.

Such conduct such as pornagraphy addiction, incest, exhibitionism, homosexual practices, approaches to young girls and breaking up the homes of others may bring heavy penalties, and can wreck any relationships and marriages eventually. Be reasonably sure on all such points before you become too greatly involved with this person.

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